All I wanna know is a goddamn thing.

I wonder if posting a picture in this thing will work. I've never tried that before. Let's start off with something simple, and then perhaps I'll try to incorporate pictures into this... here we go.

^^Can anyone see that?^^

If so, that is a picture of two of the three Ergs! playing a short set in a parking lot in Baltimore during Insubordination Fest '07. We were all packed in the Ottobar in Baltimore when all of the sudden a transformer went outside. Not like... Starskreem kind of transformer... more like an electric transformer. We all milled around outside for what felt like forever... then someone broke out and acoustic guitar and we all sat in the parking lot and watched. Two-Thergs, Eric Peabody, and Jon and Lucas playing Charlies Brown Gets A Valentine songs. It was pretty great. Memories.

I messed up making hard boiled eggs last night. Are you kidding me? First I learn that I'm a fool because there are 9 year olds that know not only words I've never heard of, but also how to spell them? Yesterday was a mighty humbling day to say the least. Screwed up hard boiled eggs... sheesh.. what do I do for an encore? Oh, I know... I'll need a 2nd or 3rd shot at making a glass of water. I'm a moron.

I'm going for Deviled Eggs: Round 2 right now. I'm confident in the first part. The hard boiled eggs part. If I ruin it this time, rest assured this will be my last blog entry. If I cut one of those little bastards in half and theres a gooey yolk inside I'm going to promptly run as fast as I can up to the top floor of the house, shedding clothes along the way. When I get to the top floor I'm going to dive, naked through the pane glass window and 3 floors down to my ultimately hilarious death. Naked and bloody in the front yard after a 3 story fall. With my luck, I'll survive and be unable to move laying there with the neighbors dog peeing on me, kids skateboarding on me and putting fireworks on me. The landlord will probably tell me it was really unacceptable for me to jump out of the 3rd floor and merely cripple myself.

Oh man, this segue kicks ass, and I'm oddly proud myself. This is probably sort of weird, and I know several people who have had pretty life changing experience based on it, but I'm kind of wanted to put on "paper" something I've been thinking about for a long time. Suicide. I can't fathom how life could be SO bad that there's no escape other than the ultimate escape. I think everyone had their fair share of issues, some more deep seeded than others, some more unthinkable than others... but how crazy must it be to have something looming so large that you find taking your own life to be the solution? I can't imagine. That person has to think there is no one in the world who has bigger problems than they do. It's the ultimate in selfish. "No one could ever feel as horrible, and want to die as much as I do". Think about that. Maybe I just don't know what having problems is like...

I'm pretty stoked on being alive. I like the variables, I like the soaring highs, dread the crushing lows, I like a lazy day where you know you've got things to do... but don't bother with the effort. I like sunny days, cloudy days, thunderstorms, wind... I just have a pretty bizarre appreciation for what makes the next day unlike the previous. Even if the events are the same... wake up, go to work, come home, sleep. I like that every day has the possibility of being something totally out of control, something surprisingly perfect, or maybe even the worst day of your life. I don't deal well with change, but I deal very well with the unknown.

I've had two Parasites records for a really long time, and I think I might have listened to them many years ago and not liked them so much... what was I thinking? They're so good! Nice poppy summery kind of music... for me at least.

This is all I've got for today. Mike and I are going to the batting cages. Then I'm going to come home and put down these deviled eggs. I really hope they are as good as I remember them being, if not, this build up is going to be quite the let down. BLAHG.